A Realization

I. Love. People.

It's as simple as that, really. Yes, I've always known it but.... I guess I surprise myself with how deeply I must. have. that. connection.

My father is an introvert, so he doesn't need that connection like I do. I don't think he understands that I need to be around my friends just as much as he needs to be alone.

My friends. Wow, they are truly fabulous people. I thank God every day for them, seriously. I love being around them. Laughing at them, watching a movie, sipping Starbucks, anything. I would love nothing more to entertain them in my home all the time! I'd love to do that. When I have my own home, it will be like that. I promise you. :-)

Maybe it's my artistic tendencies.... Artists tend to feel things deeply, both good and bad. I can't always control my emotions. Sometimes they erupt at the surface before I have a chance to yell, STOP! Although I may not feel like I need to cry about it, I do. Because it's so important for me to be understood, accepted, acknowledged, and listened to. Validated. Maybe because I get frustrated.... Not in an angry way, but because whoever I'm talking with just. doesn't. get it.

My friends matter so much to me that, yes, I guess I would cry for them. They are a part of me. Perhaps it is I that doesn't understand why someone else wouldn't value them as such.

But it's not personal. I must keep telling myself that. For me, the two are one-in-the-same and hard to differentiate between.